Carbonation

As a serious consumer of carbonated beverages, I frequently hear about the negatives of drinking carbonated water. I’ve heard that drinking carbonated beverages causes damaged to kidneys. I guess the bubbles have rough edges that tear the tissues. I’ve also heard too much carbon dioxide in the blood stream is bad. Another is that drinking carbonated beverages “cuts your wind”. Meaning a runner would not be able to get as much oxygen as they need. My friends doctor told him it puts too much CO2 in your blood stream. Excuse me….doesn’t every cell in your body create CO2?

Personally, when I drink a Coke, I walk around carefully so that the carbonation doesn’t get sloshed away. I try to avoid pouring Coke into a glass because I lose too much fizz in the process. When you drink a soda, the process of running across my tongue, around my uvula, over my oropharynx, into my throat, past my epiglottis, and down my esophagus will pretty much destroy all the carbonation. Anything left will become a burp.

Trust me, I drink a lot of soda. The other day I cut my arm. It didn’t make the “pishhhh” sound of opening a can. I wish it had, that would be pretty cool.